The EU is no good,
Chop it up for firewood,
And if it don’t burn,
Pour on some PETROL,
And have some fun.
I saw the first swallow of summer today,
It was flying above me, enjoying the day,
Tears welled in my eyes on spotting this treat,
It made me so happy my heart skipped a beat.
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The Lincoln Imp is the symbol of the City of Lincoln, the county town of Lincolnshire, England.
According to a 14th-century legend, two mischievous creatures called imps were sent by the Devil, Satan, to do evil work on Earth. After causing mayhem in Northern England, the two imps headed to Lincoln Cathedral, where they smashed tables and chairs and tripped up the Bishop. When an angel came out of a book of hymns and told them to stop, one of the imps was brave and started throwing rocks at the angel, but the other imp cowered under the broken tables and chairs. The angel turned the first imp to stone, giving the second imp a chance to escape. It is said that even on still days it is always windy around the Cathedral, which is the second imp circling the building looking for his friend.
There are many variations on Lincoln Imp legends. According to one popular legend, the imp which escaped fled north to Grimsby, where it soon began making trouble. It entered St. James’ Church and began repeating its behaviour from Lincoln Cathedral. The angel reappeared and gave the imp’s backside a good thrashing before turning it to stone as it had the first imp at Lincoln. The “Grimsby Imp” can still be seen in St James’ Church, clinging to its sore bottom. Another legend has the escaped imp turned to stone just outside the cathedral, and sharp-eyed visitors can spot it on a South outside wall.